Sunday, April 09, 2006

I PICKED THE WINNER


I picked the winner of yesterday's Grand National almost immediately. After a cursory glance at the statistics of each runner and rider, I settled on Numbersixvalverde, and sent an obliging friend down to the bookies with my £5 safely in her mitty. Just as she was opening the front door to leave, however, I had a sudden change of heart. "No," I shouted. "Scrap Numbersixvalverde - go for Lord of Illusion."

Lord of Illusion fell at the 17th fence. Numbersixvalverde won. Piss and bollocks, as they say.

Still, on the plus side, I did learn translations for two Italian insults (rather appropriate since today is the election day of a particularly offensive campaign). They are:

Go fuck yourself with those four broken chair-legs you have at your house

and

In your arse is your entire dead family.

4 Comments:

Blogger cheekyT said...

Can't wait to hear you say them in Italian Rob, be dead funny as i am Italian.

5:06 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Bitch in Russian is 'jopa' - perhaps you could add that to the chair insult to give that Eastern feel to it.

10:13 AM  
Blogger paddington said...

Son of a bitch is "hijo de puta" in Spanish. And "pendejo" is wanker (literally, "pubic hair stuck in one's foreskin).

10:16 AM  
Blogger Comandante Gringo said...

Va fungulo, manga-cakes.

4:34 AM  

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